A Few Things I Need to Work on in My Marriage!

Well there is honestly several things I need to do better on in my marriage, but here is a list of  a few of them!  I feel like these are the most important ones! :)

--Craig always talks about how important it is for couples to pray TOGETHER!!  Josh and I do not do the best job on that.  We try to at meals with the kids, but as far as he and I praying by ourselves, it's very rare. sadly.  I have to admit that I tend to use prayer when I am needing something, not just as communication with The Lord, like it should be.  So we have some work to do in that area!  It is a hard thing to get in the habit of doing, but I know it would do wonders for our marriage.  Craig also mentioned that prayer is something that is so intimate and that is why it is a little uncomfortable to do with another person, but as husband and wife there is probably nothing better to do in effort to bring God more into your lives and marriage.

--It is difficult to come to the understanding that love is not just a feeling, it is hard work day in and day out.  It is caring about someone even though you don't like them at the moment.  That is why the divorce rate is so high, because people think love is all fun and games...it's NOT!  Especially if you're like me & like everything YOUR WAY!  Lol! #nothappenin.   Love is keeping the commitment you made on the day you got married no matter what comes along.  With God, there is always hope!!

 --COMMUNICATION IS KEY!!!  If I had a dime for every fight that simple COMMUNICATION could have solved I'd have quite a few dimes.  #Ineedadiiiime (LOL Lindsey)  But seriously, I am terrible at talking thru things or remembering to tell him random things or going over plans.  I don't know why, but if I know something in MY head, I assume other people are aware of it too.  I know that sounds stupid, but its true.  I just seriously forget to update people on sometimes fairly important things.  It has bitten me in the butt a few times.  Also, sometimes I avoid subjects altogether if I know it will cause us to fight.  #doesNOThelp  This is also where my sarcasm doesn't help matters.  I need to learn to hold my tongue in most situations and that could help quite a bit as well!  It is so easy to get caught up in trying to "win" an argument, but when couples argue, NO ONE WINS!!!

 --Men need RESPECT from their wives and I need to do better at that.  I tend to use my sarcasm in knockin my husband here and there.  Like the other day when he put gel in Kyndals hair and I told him he did it all wrong in a mocking tone, that was RUDE and unnecessary.  I SHOULD have said GOOD JOB and thank you for trying to help me with Kyndals hair, but I can take it from here :)  I tend to be rude about things if they're not done the way I want them and that is not okay.  I must improve on showing gratitude when he helps in ANY way and having a thankful heart instead of mocking him or being condescending about it.  It probably doesn't affect him too bad, but it builds up over time and I am quite sure it can have an impact on whether he continues to help me or not.  Why would you want to continue helping ANYONE if all they do is whine about it and be rude???  No one would continue that.  I need to work on being much more respectful to him in every situation!!  "However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband."  Ephesians 5:33

 --I have read several times that wives/mothers need to love their spouse more than their children.  I have often defended myself, saying that the children, at the ages they are at, have to fully rely on me to do anything and so I feel justified for putting Josh last.  NOT OKAY!!  When the kids get older and no longer think I am totally awesome, Josh will still be there!  The kids will grow up and get married and leave the home, but Josh will still be there!  I MUST continue putting effort in to my relationship with my husband or it will fade out without me even realizing it.  I am happy that Josh doesn't really mind a whole lot and he understands that the kids need me and that takes the majority of my time.  But I am saying that I have got to work on my relationship with my husband harder than I have to work on my relationship with my kids.  My kids need me, my husband needs me...it can sometimes get to the point of overwhelming, but that is when I need to turn to God and ask for wisdom and ask Him to show me how to proceed and handle the situations that will come around.

 --I must NEVER compare my husband to anyone else.  It can get tempting when you hear all the super romantic stories and you're secretly wishing your spouse was in the least bit romantic.  lol!  Or when you hear your friend talking about all her husband has done for her, Satan always wants to put those thoughts in your head.  "well why doesn't he do THIS for me?"  "well so and so does that for her, so why wont you do that for me too?"  "Man, their life must be soooo great, they have EVERYTHING"  Don't do it!!!   I must NOT let myself fall victim to wanting what other people have.  I am in the perfect place, with the perfect husband by my side, and I am exactly where God wants me to be!  I am forever grateful for that!  I know that God wants me where I am at..and that is ALL I need!

--FORGIVENESS!!  Heck, there is even a song written about it!  lol!  What a true song it is.  "The prisoner that it really frees is YOU!"  I forgive fairly easily and I tend to let things go and not remember them.  I am not sure if that is because I make the effort to or just because I have an awful memory, but either way it helps me not hold grudges.  I have held a grudge on a man that wronged my dad much longer than on anyone who has ever wronged me.  I am working on moving past that and letting go of what that jerk did. #hatehim #illgetthereeventually  Craig said you are most like God when you give and forgive.  Makes sense huh?!  God has forgiven me of lying, cheating, stealing, hurting the people I love the most, and He has brought me out of it all, so the least I can do is forgive my husband when we have some minor argument.  When I look at it that way, forgiving seems like a no-brainer.  I need to forgive and let it go and never bring it up again.  If I was seriously wronged, then I MUST trust God when He says vengeance is His.  If it was something minor, then I need to see it as such and get over it. 

 I absolutely LOVE my husband so much and I am so thankful that God put us together!  I am excited about spending the rest of my life with him and our wonderful family that we have.  I love watching him play with the kids and he is a great daddy too!  We have our disagreements as every couple does, but I am so glad that we always work through them and come out better in the end!  I love you Joshua!  Here are a couple pics I thought were cute! :)